How He does cause one to tremble at the mention of His name… It was at one point in life after many days and many hours on my knees, with frustration for the emptiness I felt, that while in my prayer closet I asked the Lord why it was that I should come again and again to this place in hopeful expectation of my time with Him, yet never receive an answer or even so much as a greatly needed reply. Why could I not sense Him and know that He was as real as my own flesh and why should I not hear His voice respond to me like a friend who comforts a friend?
“Doesn’t His Word say that I am His friend?” I mulled.
And suddenly a presence stepped into the room just beyond my closet doors.
And, instantly I heard my mind ask its question, “Can you accept Him if He appears before you now?”
I knew I need only step through the door to see Him. I found myself simultaneously reaching for the knob while stepping backwards instead. It was my choice, but how could I — somehow, I couldn’t. I felt in that moment He would surely step through causing me to catch a glimpse of His magnificence. He could indeed cause me to see, in one moment, in this instance, all that is hidden… I would see how true it was that He is always near, He stays as close as my words! I shut my eyes fiercely, turning rapidly to my knees. He was now standing where I knelt. With an inexplicable fear that caused me to tremble, I buried my face deep inside my arms clinging to the ground.
“No, No I cannot. I cannot lift my eyes to see! I am not worthy… I am so sorry.” I wept.
I clenched my chest in hand and thought my heart would stop. And through my panting sobs His steps withdrew… Retrieving my breath, once calm again, I understood how great and powerful is His glorious presence. Realizing just how fragile is the human heart within so weak a body, I was grateful to learn why it is we have been given the gift of prayer as the means by which we communicate with the Almighty. ~.~
Since that day, somehow, I am more aware of His presence. I know that it is always accessible. And, with each new experience, I learn of His demonstrative affections. I revel in experiencing His manifest beauty. It causes me to wonder, longing all the more to know Him more intimately. So that now I listen. I hear the arriving sound of His outward expressions and listen all the more intently for His still small voice. I hear His voice, He is always speaking.
Now as He comes with every visit even nearer still, each time it causes me to tremble. He floods my soul with rushing power from the Comforter and my shaking no longer ignites from fear, but from the awesome wonderment of the Glory of His touch. His river washes over me with wave after wave. It captivates my spirit and arrests my flesh. I am captured. A captive of His Love, He is more real to me than my life. ♥