There I was; my body sprawled sideways across the floor, my cheek pressed into carpet fibers, my eyes hidden behind a blanket of hair covering one arm tossed across my head. My mind was drowning in musical bliss, the bass forcefully reverberating within my body once again squeezing from my conscience all concerns of how this spectacle appeared. This was why I had come; in pursuit of this overwhelmingly welcoming familiar event. My soul now having been exhausted by its resistance, my body worn down from protest, I had forced surrender from vanity turning its grip into sacrifices of praise. Praise transformed to adoration freeing me from mental weights, my spirit soaring with one determination remaining.. worship was my aim. It was pure worship that had brought me to this place so many times before. I longed to return, where heavens open up allowing me to enter in.
I’ve decided to live each breath in constant contemplation of this blessed event. I set my daily tasks, one leading to the next, each purposed toward a path designed to lead me again to this end, this anticipated labor of a love that never leaves. My mind is in pursuit, a constant craving for His open door of worship by which I step into the throne room of His Grace.
…once again, I’ve found this secret place. My thoughts have passed the threshold now where reason is transformed to revelation. Within this place of sweet surrender, an absolute state of joy in true worship for my King, I peer through brunette strands to catch a glimpse of His feet resting at His throne. My spirit lies distant, my view shifts to throngs of angels towering and passionately demonstrating constant songs of adoration to my Heavenly Father, “Worthy is the Lord God Almighty.” The floor now clears, a way is made, somehow my body’s drawn toward Him, closer now than ever. My arm can reach, my hand could touch…. “I want to know You, Lord.” My voice is a faint whisper, my natural mind still cognizant of strobes that stream through tousled hair reflecting gently down my face. I’m still outstretched, innately poised, positioned sheltered from any distraction. I rest in peace, such peace and joy, my meditation causes me to tremble, fluttering in waves of warming currents washing free all stress and worry from my frame. His touch pours out and covers all, my physical senses awakening my spirit all the more…
So much clarity has been released from this repose. . . Detached from time, here come my sought for answers, here come all seven Spirits burning, scorching life’s realities away. Thoughts present from this age begin to fade away to take their rightful place among the carnal facts of earthly truths. No longer with their claim on me, my mind breaks free willingly receiving pleasant spirit-thoughts beyond the veil that flood my mind and ease my soul. Spirit receiving spiritual things, another realm once dimly lit, reveals to me where why and what, but without words. Emotions now are taking hold, creating their own language for my understanding.
Heaven has drawn back the veil and I can briefly grasp the mysteries. All selfish thoughts so easily succumb in this place that mutes the evil one. The soulish lies disintegrate, my spirit strengthens all the more intently focused on the voice I’ve come to Love. His voice speaks gently, kindly, sounding repetitions waiting for my recognition. My spirit now increasing in its craving to break loose, now resting in the absence of evil, arousing its control and letting loose my voice with crying shouts that bellow forth for more of Him. My groans from depths before unknown burst forcefully aloud releasing tear filled shrieks of gratitude for this strong bliss that raises me up to my knees. With lifted hands in adoration of this wonder that He would visit me so intimately amidst this noise. I’m on my feet! A dance to match this wonderful beat too beautiful for words and I am humbled by His presence in awe and wonder of His touch. I feel it now, so powerful within my soul inside of places buried deep, I feel the dance. I never knew I owned these places, springing up alive with healing power rushing through me. This rushing river keeping me in quickened health. I hear it raging, sounds of water flowing all around and over me. Then all grows silent. He keeps His place so close as I stay frozen. His breath quite near, I want to take it in, my pores now tingle as His wind blows passed me, gently. I feel it sooth my fragile frame. I’m shaking now, my pants begin. I catch my breath, but only for a moment. It’s all so real, my thankfulness exceeds the joy I’m feeling. Overflowing speeds unsteadily escaping into panting breath so glorious. Laughter follows after as my mind falls into depths so vast I can’t escape this place I’m captured in. This type of racing heart has been unknown to me before this massive shattering of time that meets eternity, both now colliding from within. My joy pours out.
“Undo the veil, undo the veil, undo the veil.” He speaks in echoes. “I want to show you more of Me. I want to open up your eyes. I will reveal My will to you. Right now come dance a dance with Me. All things will be made clear.”
How can I not respond to this? I’m urged to spin and turn in waves. How dare I cower back from God’s own call? His call wants all of me. There is no place for this pride that keeps me from the benefit. I abide in awesome wonderment, I yield, I dance, and cry that this could come so easily. All that I need, He’s given me. What He requires is found in our surrendering. I’ve acquired all I seek. I live to give to Him still more, I give my All and He returns His favor…His answers now so simply seen. This realm so easily unraveling what seemed impossible to capture. It’s now made clear, His Love so dear. It’s all been done, already won.