Tag Archives: Eternity

When healing comes…

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An insatiable sickness was demanding an accounting of my faith; my delays had only led me to death’s door. Now, of necessity, I forced my answer to the critical question that had been echoing through my life. Was Jesus Christ the son of God come to save humanity? Out loud, with tear-filled eyes, I whispered the words, “Yes, I believe.”
Sincerity would require a wholly committed embrace of His deity; belief in His written Word would be the proof…

I now know that it was not my own faith, but His measure given to me by Grace, that caused me to believe in His sacrifice. For the first time, a broken ego and humble heart began to search the scriptures. It was by His Holy Spirit that my eyes were opened to His supernatural power that had always been at work within me … I began to chase after His promises…

In time, through faith-filled seeking with a habit of meditation and praise I had developed in my prayer closet, I became familiar with the transforming presence of God through holy and pure surrender. It was in this safe environment wholly focused on Jesus that my spirit awoke and I became aware of His touch; so weighty and precious is His tangible presence. This knowledge opened up the way for God’s guidance that then led me to like-minded believers that openned the door to a spirit-filled, charismatic church.  I entered this place, where God had directed, immediately recognizing the same glorious Presence I had experienced in my private encounters with the Holy Spirit. Here, I found Him in even greater measure, filling me up, communicating His love and purpose for my life through complete surrender in unabashed worship. In seeking after Jesus Christ, I found my total healing; in constant pursuit, I keep it.

This type of walk with my Lord and Savior causes me to recognize Christ; in people and places, in conversation and song.  He is now effortlessly felt, and whenever He retreats into the background whether in dark circumstances or simply those moments that fail to show love, I immediately sense the Holy Spirit within me grieving …nevertheless, His mercy pours out. His power unmatched; His Love is released. I’ve learned that His Word does not return void and His will is always done at the mention of His name.

His name is Jesus. He is Christ, my Lord; my all-powerful Savior.  All I purpose to know is my God. All I wish to seek is His presence. Ten thousand prayers and a lifetime’s pursuit has shown me the entrance to His throne room of Grace where I’m readily ushered in, where my desire to know Him intimately intensifies.

It has been 18 years now since my healing. My gratitude and love toward Him is unending, ever-increasing. The memory of His warm healing wind has not faded. I long to step into the rushing waves of His glory. My sustained health continually reminds me of just how real is our Savior. He cares for us with an unconditional, immeasurable, undying Love. ❤ ~.~

I hear the sound…

Spirit Break Out

How He does cause one to tremble at the mention of His name… It was at one point in life after many days and many hours on my knees, with frustration for the emptiness I felt, that while in my prayer closet I asked the Lord why it was that I should come again and again to this place in hopeful expectation of my time with Him, yet never receive an answer or even so much as a greatly needed reply. Why could I not sense Him and know that He was as real as my own flesh and why should I not hear His voice respond to me like a friend who comforts a friend?

“Doesn’t His Word say that I am His friend?” I mulled.

And suddenly a presence stepped into the room just beyond my closet doors.

And, instantly I heard my mind ask its question, “Can you accept Him if He appears before you now?”

I knew I need only step through the door to see Him. I found myself simultaneously reaching for the knob while stepping backwards instead. It was my choice, but how could I — somehow, I couldn’t. I felt in that moment He would surely step through causing me to catch a glimpse of His magnificence. He could indeed cause me to see, in one moment, in this instance, all that is hidden… I would see how true it was that He is always near, He stays as close as my words! I shut my eyes fiercely, turning rapidly to my knees. He was now standing where I knelt. With an inexplicable fear that caused me to tremble, I buried my face deep inside my arms clinging to the ground.

“No, No I cannot. I cannot lift my eyes to see! I am not worthy… I am so sorry.” I wept.

I clenched my chest in hand and thought my heart would stop. And through my panting sobs His steps withdrew… Retrieving my breath, once calm again, I understood how great and powerful is His glorious presence. Realizing just how fragile is the human heart within so weak a body, I was grateful to learn why it is we have been given the gift of prayer as the means by which we communicate with the Almighty. ~.~

Since that day, somehow, I am more aware of His presence. I know that it is always accessible. And, with each new experience, I learn of His demonstrative affections. I revel in experiencing His manifest beauty. It causes me to wonder, longing all the more to know Him more intimately. So that now I listen. I hear the arriving sound of His outward expressions and listen all the more intently for His still small voice. I hear His voice, He is always speaking.

Now as He comes with every visit even nearer still, each time it causes me to tremble. He floods my soul with rushing power from the Comforter and my shaking no longer ignites from fear, but from the awesome wonderment of the Glory of His touch. His river washes over me with wave after wave. It captivates my spirit and arrests my flesh. I am captured. A captive of His Love, He is more real to me than my life. ♥

 

His Love ♥

How do I? How can I? I need to know…

All of my life, I’ve searched for You, Lord. My heart’s desire has been to know You. My constant striving to please You, always hoping that my ‘doing’ might cause You to take notice. I supposed that You might move on my behalf; that you would possibly extend your hand of favor… –and favor has come, blessings and favor and constant provision. But, now I see that it was not because of my efforts, but because of Your Love. It has never come because of my selfish endeavors. But, when circumstance and struggle brought me to complete surrender, my selfishness ended and Your Mercy overflowed…
 It was not for Your sake that spiritual laws have been set. I’ve finally learned that it was for my own sake that there was a longing placed inside of me to know You — and my eyes were set upon a book — a book that is summed up in one word — Love. You are Love. It is only inside of complete and unconditional Love that we find our answers. And, the benefit of our search is not for You, but for each of us. In and through Love, we find pure Praise and true Worship flows. It is only out of the purest Praise and Worship that we begin to see Truth.

Forever mankind has grappled with the question, “Why?” Now I see that all of life’s answers can be found, not in the question “why?” but, in the search for “how?” 
How can I see You? 
How can I find You? 
How do I seek You?
How can I know You?

In this question, eternity begins to open up to us, and it becomes more real than anything in this temporary life… —-and our answers are hidden inside of our Worship. They come through our complete surrender. This is where our carnal mind quiets in the background and our natural state begins to transform; our perceptions begin to change and our spirit rises up to overtake and outperform the flesh—- Only then does the door into Your realm crack open. And, it pours out such a flood so magnificent we cannot help but to be overtaken by Your Love, Peace, Joy, Laughter, Praise, Healing, Wisdom, and Glory!!! …and it is intoxicating … and I am addicted. I am overwhelmed and undone by Your electrifying touch, Your pure Presence. I am run through by Your profound Peace, and now I see You. I have found You in my Worship. I have learned how to seek and know You, and I hear Your voice in the song.

~.~