My sorrowful attempts at meaningful prayers and study of the Bible at times can produce only outbursts of tears. Sometimes, sense of duty overtakes a love starved heart and reason gets forgotten. Just what purpose is in the seeking, I have to remind myself. Where there may be a sincere intention for intimacy, when the motivation is self seeking, the result becomes this unnatural striving to simply put-in-time with our Heavenly Father, God in hopes of finding favor for a sought after aim. From this position, we can mistakenly grieve the Holy Spirit. Because, being a Christian is never a chore, or set of rules, or some duty that we are trying to accomplish in order to please our Lord. No, Christianity is a courtship, and it is One that is founded on Jesus Christ and based in pure Love. An unconditional and overwhelming love that draws us into righteousness, peace, and joy. It holds Truth that compels us to seek more, simply to know and understand this outrageous love-Truth that our Lord and Savior is constantly pouring out to us. We know we don’t deserve it and we know we can’t earn it. It seems so unbelievable to receive it, and yet we have received. Undeniable and irrevocable, we cling to this tangible love that has made its home within our spirit. The changes are permanent and there’s no going back to what once was…
This is what I must remember. When we open the Bible or quiet our soul in prayer, it is from a place of wanting to see, experience, and understand this gracious love.
When we are having trouble with desire and motivation, this is a time to simply rest in places of praise and thanksgiving for all the many wonderful things that have taken place… If we are blocked in our heart and soul from having a desire or ability to recognize the many blessings in our day to day, we must ask for help from Holy Spirit to quicken and enlighten our spirit. The place of revelation and the drawing by our Father into the Words of Christ, whether in prayer or scripture, can only be found from a position of humility and sincere repentance. We must confess our weakness, in order to be made strong. We must ask forgiveness and forgive in order to be forgiven. And we must believe and trust that God is real and hears our requests and will help our unbelief and struggle.
The struggle of prayer and study is very common and understood by God. He never condemns or gives guilt. He always is waiting and loving and patient. We can be satisfied to allow stretches of silence in the relationship as all the while resting in a place of acceptance from our Holy Father, Son and Spirit. From this place of acceptance and love, a natural curiosity and prompting will begin to rise as it calls our heart, soul, and mind to seek out this extravagant love story that is Christianity.
Begin from this place. Grasp this perspective and study and prayer will come naturally. It may be small and scattered at first, but will surely blossom when it is sought after from this place of pure Love. 💗
Blessings
My Experience of ♥ God's Love ♪♫ Worship ♫♪ & Eternity ♥ 